Welcome to my world dog!


I am not sure who has done what, but Alex has just roared an almighty roar (at first I did believe we had a stray lion in the garage, he’s extremely adept at animal noises!), upon entering the garage, I then heard something or other “Effing cats” so I assume, it is they who have done something……..Alex tells me that the cat decided it would be fun to see what it would be like to trip him up whilst he was carrying a load of collated leaflets. One nearly broken arm later and a trodden on, cursed cat, he has calmed down a bit…..I am pleased to report.

It has been a lovely calm day today. I say calm, and I am not sure I really know the meaning of this word any more, but I, and I think the kids, thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. It was mild, the sun was out and the chickens were flappy (!), the cats are chilling in warm retreats, and the dog well, he is being his usual soppy/stupid self! As Monty got a set of football goals for Christmas, we decided to put them into use. Oh yes, more football for the mother who can’t even catch very well, let alone coordinate herself to kick a ball, and aim it all at once! But I give it a go, I could die trying though, I am so hopeless! I have a bread mix in a bowl in my hands at the same time, which does not aid my cause I suppose, but we gotta eat…..! So I am busy stirring my bowl of yeast flour and water, trying to look sporty and all “Jolly hockey sticks” sort of mummy, whilst trying to ignore the smell of pooh, which seems to be frequently wafting in my direction. I am used to that though, and battle on. Lola has placed herself in the middle of the pitch-she had wanted a family game of barbies- but as the sun was out, I insisted on outdoor entertainment. Poor girl. She is now sitting there, head in her hands huffing deliberately and ducking every now and again to avoid the football that is flying past her head at frequent intervals, as the match carries on regardless. Mitzi is busy running around, intermittently having a little boogy and singing her heart out to a few mixed French/English Christmas songs. The well known “jingle bells, jingle bells, papa noels gonna venir”, (father Christmas is gonna come for non-French speakers!). Then insisting on holding my hand to kick the football, still with bread mix in my hand (it takes 20 minutes), suffice to say, it is not the easiest task in hand. She is freakily strong, she is tiny, but built like a little mountain, full of force, and she manages to nearly pull me down with each attempt. Thankfully, I hold my ground, I am stuck quite literally in mud, so the rain has helped with something! Oliver, the dog, does love his football, he, like me, is extremely useless at the sport, but really makes an effort trying. He runs around, barking madly at the ball, and at whoever is attempting to shoot. He guards it and digs his teeth into the ball, helpful. We have lost several balls this way. He is a hindrance to say the least, but so very loveable, all the same!

I was sporting my new top from mum as I went to blitz some food for the sauce I was making, and the flappy bit gets stuck in there and I very nearly die by being sucked into the food processor and blitzed to death. I don’t, I survive, and although the top is now a bit flappier, it is still wearable! In a game of hide-and-seek, Lola’s request, as she had to choose and outdoor friendly activity- I realise, when it is my turn to count that I was doing it exactly like one of kids……I was stood, staring out of the gate onto the road kicking at things, with passers by bidding me ‘Bonjour’ with slightly concerned faces. In all this little Esmie is telling me non-stop to “Watch ME! Watch me, mummy!” at the top of her voice.

We headed down to the beach this evening to watch the sun go down (and proper tire the 4 kids out before bed!). In a quick head count before we return, we are missing one, the dog, we are just in time to see him running off after a single couple…..You see? Stupid, he is following a single couple wnk (with no kids)……He is obviously confused, our four soon get him back, and is reminded in sledge hammer fashion (like me every morning) that this couple are very much wk (with kids). Welcome to my world dog!

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